I came across my high school yearbook recently and took a few minutes to leaf through it. I don’t know about you, but if high school was the pinnacle of my life, I would be a very sad individual. It isn’t that I didn’t do good things then; it’s just that there is so much more to life than those few years. Life gets so much better. Anyway, I saw the comments from my classmates, who really didn’t know me well. So many of them wrote, “You’re a great guy – don’t ever change!” (xoxoxo). Cue David Bowie. The truth is that the only thing that doesn’t change is that everything and everyone changes. If you hold the same opinions and ideas and beliefs at 50 that you held at 20, you are either Jesus or a person who needs to get out more. And even Jesus changed His mind; but that’s for another time.
It is, I think, one of the worst insults you can throw at someone, that they can’t change. It may be like the task of Sisyphus, but everyone can change. And while the cynic in me can see how much our country needs to change, the realist in me can see how much we have. As we evolve – as we learn and grow – as we read and travel and discuss – we change. When I sit with a couple preparing for marriage, I ask each one what they like the most about the other person; an easy task. Then I ask them what they don’t like about the other person, and it gets really awkward (crickets). I tell them that if one of their goals is to force the other person to change to what they want them to be, their marriage has little hope of lasting. Each person will change over time; forcing them to bend to our perception of what they should be will only lead to heartache. Change is inevitable. And sure; we are all fearfully and wonderfully made by an amazing Creator; but we are also imperfectly made. We all need to evolve.
I have changed a lot over the years, and I would like to think that most of it has been for the better. I have seen the people I know and love change too, and those changes have been remarkable. If we get stuck in adolescence (which many people do), we become a danger to ourselves and those we love; adolescence has a purpose but should only last for a couple of years. If we get stuck in an ideology or theology that isn’t embracing of others, we end up being a bigot. A comedian I saw recently had a routine about racism. He said that we should label it as a mental illness and give racists an aide to help them overcome their hateful beliefs. Funny – and not funny. It seems to me that a lot of the pain and suffering being produced in the world comes from people who are stuck and need help moving forward. The unwillingness to look at ourselves honestly is, to me, a sure sign that there’s something very wrong. Change is not only necessary; it is good for the soul. And the world. And the human race. You’re a great person – don’t ever stop changing. We can all do with some positive change in our lives.
Prayer – God of change and evolution, take our imperfect selves and teach us to be better than we have been before. Help us to make the world better too. Amen.
Today’s art is called “Changes” by Lori Latham.