In a recent legal case, a farmer from East Lansing, Michigan, was awarded a small amount of money in damages and a large amount in legal fees for defending his right to not have same-sex weddings on his property. It is another example of the tenuous balance between the right to one’s religious views and the rights of others whose lives, in some way, disagree with those views. The rights that each one of us has to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness don’t always match, and this friction, while never truly resolved, makes lawyers very rich. The question isn’t a small one: should a doctor who opposes abortion be forced to do them? Should I be forced to perform weddings for anyone who wants me to? We can argue all we want about this, but the law has been clearly on the side of personal conscience and religious freedom, something we all need to cherish. And yes – you have the right to hate anyone you choose to hate.
The line is drawn at committing violence, and these cases are not about that. They are about people with deeply held religious convictions choosing to not bake cakes or allow receptions on their property. As misguided and immoral as I might think these views are, I cannot control someone else’s interpretation of God and what they think God is telling them to do. I will defend the rights of anyone who peacefully disagrees with me, and I will try with all of my theological might to change their minds. In the end, though, we all have the right to hate and love others based on our personal perspective. We cannot legislate compassion and acceptance. These are individual choices too.
Which means that the rest of us have to offer alternatives. This is one of the reasons I have given over the years for our church’s decision to become an inclusive church. We are an Open & Affirming (ONA) congregation- the first in our region in Pennsylvania – because we do not think a person’s sex or gender is a sin. We have been very clear with the larger community that there are plenty of faith communities that define themselves by who they hate, so there should be some that define themselves by who they love. We strive to be that kind of church. We aren’t a perfect community; we have our difficulties and challenges just like everyone else. When it comes to inclusion, however, we have chosen to stand before God as a safe place for those who would be abused and oppressed by other people of faith.
In so many ways, this Michigan farmer seems to be a good person. I don’t know him, nor will I judge him – that is beyond my paygrade. My hope is that someday when someone he loves comes out to him, he will have a change of heart. I hope that his opinion about LGBTQ people will change; knowing them will enrich him in so many ways. I hope that he will see God’s image in each one of them and learn that love is love. Until then, those whom he has excluded will just have to find another place to get married. I suggest an ONA church. They will be welcome there. As you are welcome at Calvary UCC in Reading, PA. Because God is still speaking.
Prayer – Help all of us, Holy God, to become more like You as we offer Your love in spite of our lack of understanding. Amen.