The 2011 movie, “The Help”, was a remarkable piece of storytelling. In the movie, there is a touching scene in which the nanny, Aibileen, tells Mae, the child she is raising, “You is kind, you is smart, you is important.” This movie, depicting an era of shame for most of us who understand history, shows the courage and struggles of people of color in the 1960’s. America saw itself as the greatest nation in the world; we had defeated the Nazis, had a booming economy, and were reaching for the stars. We also were struggling with our legacy of systemic racism and misogyny. It was a time when equality became our goal; a goal we are still working hard to achieve.
I have known a lot of people who are one or more of those qualities, but I have met fewer who have all three. I’m not talking about the niceness that so many of us mistake for kindness; I am talking about kindness that considers what matters and isn’t afraid to be honest. Niceness is about smiling and nodding one’s head so that nobody takes offense. Kindness is a different story. In a competitive world where intelligence and power have usually ruled, kindness is often put aside. Making money, often a byproduct of power and intelligence, can overwhelm the importance of justice and morality and ethics. Kindness reminds us that every person is deserving of respect, but not everyone can always get what they want. I can hear Mick singing it – if you try sometimes, you get what you need.
I have known a lot of smart people, and I have known lots of powerful people. Most of the smart ones know they are smart, and that is great; I was raised believing I wasn’t smart and have fought like crazy to change that perception. It is the people who think they are the smartest people in the room and behave that way who lack kindness. It is the powerful who use their power without considering the needs of the least among us (that’s Jesus talking) who lack kindness. As one insightful member of a church I served said to me, “You’re smart? That’s nice. But are you kind? That’s what really matters.” Being kind isn’t for the faint of heart. Being kind means standing with people who are in need of support. It means speaking up when bullies are in the act of oppressing others. It costs nothing to be nice; it costs everything to be kind.
The Apostle Paul wrote, “Faith, hope, and love; abide these three. But the greatest of these is love.” I will rework it; “Doing important things, using your intelligence, and being kind; abide by these three. But the greatest of these is being kind.”
Prayer – Holy God, the world has lots of smart and powerful people; help us to be kinder. Amen.
Today’s art is a Kindness Tree that is on the wall at Riverside Elementary in Reading, PA. Our church has designated this school as mission outreach, and this tree is in one of the hallways.