30 Years

It was on this day in 1994 that my wife and I, with our almost 1-year-old son (the next day was his birthday), moved to Berks County, PA. We had left Cincinnati the day before, stayed overnight at a friend’s house in Pittsburgh, and got to our new home in Pricetown. Most of our belongings were on a truck (it was 4th of July week), and we had no refrigerator or clothes dryer. Since that day, our daughter was born, my wife has started 3 businesses, 3 of our 4 parents have died, and we have bought 3 houses. I left the United Methodist Church for the United Church of Christ, we’ve made and lost a lot of friends, and seen a lot of good people leave this life for the next. 30 years seems like a long time, and in many ways, it is. It also isn’t.

I think of Five for Fighting’s haunting song “100 Years”, when the words, “I’m 15 for a moment” are followed by 22, 33, 67, and 100. In my work I have presided over funerals of babies and people who were 107; life is short, even when, as the song says, you only have 100 years to live. Relationships have value, but not all of them are worth keeping. Toxic people can destroy us as they destroy themselves, but we are the ones who allow it. I have watched people disconnect over meaningful and foolish things; I have heard ridiculous stories and real tragedies. We make choices; some are good, while others are not. Choose wisely – those choices stick. 

It was also on July 1st that I began my ministry at my present call. It was 1999, and this old-fashioned, beautiful congregation decided to take the chance on a driven, committed, unpredictable former Methodist. I warned them what they were getting into, but they decided to take a chance anyway. A lot of people never gave me a chance – the well had been poisoned during the dating period. Some leftover time for a lot of different reasons, and we wished them well. Many found a home of inclusion because the people who stayed opened their hearts and minds and arms. In the church, at least, life is too short to be mean. Jesus would not approve.

I hope I get another 30 years on this earth. 30 more years to wake up next to my amazing wife. 30 years to see our family grow and to make new friends. 30 years to still do whatever my mind and body allow me to do. 30 years seems like a long time, and in many ways, it is. It also isn’t. Use your time wisely. Life is short and life is beautiful. All we can do is make ours matter.

Prayer – We thank You God for this life that is uniquely ours. May it make You proud. Amen. 

Today’s art is “The Art of Aging” by Shannon Wylie.

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